A Lady Like This I Cannot Be

Over the Deepavali weekend, I met a lady. First time that we met. Let's call her Laura.

It was at a mutual friend's Deepavali luncheon.
So, Laura and I got into a conversation about life, children, marriage, religion and, well, the world and the universe.
She is a very attractive woman in her 40s. A Eurasian who's now married to a Muslim. She was married to a non-Muslim and they had two (now grown-up) children.
She has two sons with her current husband.

It was a nice afternoon as we finished off the marrukku. Antonio was with our mutual friend's hubby and buddies at the other end of the garden.

Ok...what Laura told me really left me gaping like an idiot.

She told me that she loves her husband. Otherwise she would have left him when she found out that he had an affair.

An affair? Sex and sex?

"You mean you forgave him? Forgive and forget? Why", I asked, in astonishment.

"I could also not forgive him and leave him....," she replied. But she chose not to because she loves him.

She told me that she never knew her husband was cheating on her, all those two years.

TWO YEARS? And he he got away with that?

She found out about it because his young mistress called her and admitted to everything. She had already converted to Islam in the hope that he would marry her.

That's the trick mistresses use.

Not getting anywhere after being together that long so you spill the beans so that something will happen. Doesn't matter what. But hell if I'm gonna go through this like i don't exist in his life!

Aaah... the mistress' mantra.

When she confronted her husband, he denied. He never admitted to a single thing that the young woman alleged. Not the lust nor the love.

The mistress came to Laura's matrimonial home. In the presence of the wayward husband, she gave details of the relationship.

He admitted to nothing. Laura did not react. There was no hell, no fury in her case.

Forlorn, the mistress, left..

"Did you believe her or him?", I asked.

"I believe there was something. I don't know if it was an affair. Even if I cut his hand, he' deny. I also believe that he did not want to leave me. So he had to make a choice," she said.

And Laura felt so sorry for the other woman.

Me? I felt a little disappointed because there were no fireworks. No scene.

Laura assured me that she saw no point in prolonging "her pain". She loves her husband. After all, he denied having had a relationship with the "mistress". He denied so vehemently.

Should she believe the "mistress" or her "husband"?

Laura said in a marriage, we have to always prepare ourselves to disclosures of our spouses' infidelity.

"These things happen-lah...it's ok. we just have to deal with it. It's not the end of the world," she smiled.

It must be the Eurasian in her. I swear.

"Yah...maybe. I come from a long line of very stoical and resilient people," she said.

Laura....I do too. But if I find out Antonio has been in a lust and love relationship with a babe, I don't know what I'd do.

But I know I can't be like you. Stoic and resilient, notwithstanding.